King Louis XIV was one of France’s greatest kings. Known as the Sun King for the brilliance of his court, he saw his armies make France the most powerful country of its time. When he received the news of his crushing defeat by the English at Blenheim, he purportedly proclaimed, “How could God do this to me? After all I have done for Him!” Much as this statement is so outrageous from a King and devout Christian, it is one statement that from time to time comes to our minds too if not on our lips. Expectations are like fine pottery, the harder you hold onto them, the more likely you are to crack them. Thus, Alexander Pope says, “Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.” I know of a friend who only swims in a sea of other people’s expectations. He forgets that, every now and then, men drown in seas like that. I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep my expectations. What about you?
You are your own worst enemy. If you can learn to stop expecting impossible perfection, in yourself and others, you may find the happiness that has always eluded you. It is said that “Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he can and should be and he will become as he can and should be”. The kind of expectation that we entertain in life determines our actions and future. To illustrate this point, a young psychology student decided to test the theory among his working peers. Assigned to the weekly kitchen duty, he had the responsibility of distributing apricots to his associates at the end of company lunch hour. On the first day, he approached his colleagues with a negative question, asking if they did not want any apricots?” Astonishingly, a staggering 90 percent responded with a negative answer. Realizing this approach was not effective, he decided to adopt a more positive tactic the next day. He posed the question this way, “Wouldn’t you like to enjoy some delicious apricots?” Surprisingly, approximately half of them hesitantly replied, “Uh, yeah. I’ll take some.” Not content with his findings, he decided to test a different approach the next day using the classic either/or selling technique. This time, he asked them, “Would you prefer one dish of apricots or perhaps two?” Remarkably, despite most of his peers generally disliking apricots initially, 40 percent this time opted for two dishes, while 50 percent settled for a single serving!
My dear friend, whatever you have been up to so far, just consider that your expectations are affecting your output in affective life, associations, work, ministry, or even your spiritual life. The way the questions or situations of life have posed themselves on you is probably the reason you are the way you are. What about posing the same questions differently to yourself this week? You can let me know the outcome so that we can smile or cry together in acknowledgment of wasted energy in the past. Jodi Picoult says that “There are two ways to be happy: improve your reality or lower your expectations”. Which of these are you starting with, today?
May Your Week Not Be Weak But With Him. I Send You My Prayerful Wishes.
From Fr.Ray@accGh
